Category Archives: Caregivers

Social Security is NOT CALLING YOU!

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Yes, I’m back. I’ve been debating video vs. blog and will be bringing my fun facts and face here very soon. I was tempted to do a video in my pajamas, glasses, uncombed hair and bad lighting for this post…because what I look like is so unimportant compared to this message.

PLEASE, DO NOT RESPOND IN ANYWAY TO A CALL THAT SAYS YOUR SOCIAL SECURITY NUMBER IS SUSPENDED AND YOU MUST CALL BACK. JUST DON’T DO IT.

My husband and I receive these calls almost weekly at this point. This week I received the call three times in 30 minutes. Even after blocking the number of the first two calls, the same robo-call came in on a different phone number.

I’ve seen warnings everywhere, but of course, this is my field, so I do see posts from AARP, Social Security, Retirement websites….all of whom have tried to get this message out. I am certain I have told my elderly mom to tell her friends this is a scam. Many of my own friends and relatives have called me asking if they should return the call. So it is not common knowledge that this is a scam.

But here’s the kicker. My smart, sweet Mom got the call three times yesterday in 30 minutes and was so certain it had to be legit. She returned the call and when a man answered and said: “Why are you calling?” my mom replied: “I don’t really know.” And the man disconnected. This makes me think that they are running so many scams, they aren’t sure which one you’re calling about so they can pretend to be whoever you are frightened of.

Please, please please pass this information to everyone: young and old, sick and well, informed or uninformed. We’ve got to stop the bleeding of stealing from good people. The only way to accomplish this is to educate and remove the fear of saying: “Nope, I’ll call my friend, daughter, son, accountant, the police before I call you back.” Let’s fight this together.

After I get dressed, I’ll do a video. After all, Halloween is over, don’t want to scare the kids! I love you all, I do! Stay safe.

“You Just have to Laugh………when it’s funny, but get mad when they’re trying to rip you off!!!”

It Ain’t Gettin’ Any Easier!

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Pretty much every day, I am alarmed by little stories I find by scanning information about Elder issues.

My new friend Joanne Giardini-Russell, a true Medicare Guru, wrote an article this week about one of her clients who continued to go to work up to age 71. That, in itself, wasn’t a big surprise to me. If 60 is the new 40, working to age 70 or older,  is bound to happen more and more. Many of us actually like working.  Sure, many must keep working, and that is another article, for sure. But many people do work well into their 70’s and even 80’s. And those same hard-working people are often horrified about seemingly innocuous decisions they made (or didn’t make, by omission) and how they have placed themselves or their spouse into true fear of imminent destitution. Because of runaway health care costs.

You see, this guy’s venial sin was working too long and not retiring…..his mortal sin was not getting good information about how this affected his health insurance….more specifically Medicare. Suffice it to say that Joanne is trying to help this couple who have blown through more than $30,000…YES, THAT IS THIRTY THOUSAND DOLLARS…. of their own money, even though he had group insurance at work.

I don’t know this unfortunate couple’s story. But my guess is, they were not educated at work, they did not know how to use Medicare to their advantage at age 65, they did not take advantage of all the options at work for short-term disability and long-term disability, even if it required a contribution, and so on.

Those of us in this field are trying hard to get everyone to see the advantage of advanced planning instead of crisis planning. We are trying to work with your Financial Advisors,  your HR people at work, and quite frankly, anyone else who will listen, including you.

Find us. Ask us to come to your work and speak. Ask us questions on the internet machine!

Buy our books, yeah I said it. But let me ask you a question, if anyone could have saved thirty dollars, three thousand dollars, or thirty thousand dollars, by buying a book for fifteen dollars, would that be worth it? Yes, my friends, I think it would. #WhoMovedMyTeeth?

 

There is tons of good information out there. But you must find the experts, read things, ask questions and take action. Now is the time if you are a Baby Boomer, now is the time if your parents are in their 50’s and 60’s.

Oh, and to you Millennials and Gen-Xers….it’s never too late!

 

“You Just Have to…… Get Your Sh%$#@# Together…..and then you can Laugh all the way to the bank!”

Joanne doesn’t even know I’m telling you about her….so she will see this when you do.  If If you have any inkling that you want to discuss what you should do about signing up for Medicare:

Check out my friend Joanne at :

Boomer Health Group

Joanne Giardini-Russell, Medicare Guru

http://www.boomerhealthgroup.com/

 

 

ALMOST EVERYONE IS FALLING FOR THIS NEW MEDICARE CARD SCAM! PROTECT MOM!

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This is so important, that I scrapped my blog for today, for this. And since it is Friday afternoon, I’m going to repeat it again early next week. Please, for the love of God, tell your parents, your Seniors,  your neighbors, your friends,  even your enemies and maybe your pets…… that bad, bad people are scamming those with Medicare about their new cards.  THEY ARE FREE and NO ONE WILL CALL YOU ABOUT THEM:

NEW CARDS MEDICARE FRAUD ALERT: YOUR NEW CARD IS FREE!

Be Like Peg…….

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I recently got a phone call to return to great group of women and speak again. But this call went a bit differently than most conversations:

Mrs. K: Hi, Cathy! We were so happy to have you speak last year, but I think you need to return.

Me: Well, I would love to, is there anything particular you’d like me to talk about?

Mrs. K: Yes. I want you to give them the ‘SCARY TALK.”

Now, this is a group of mature women, church ladies, in fact, so I was pretty sure she didn’t mean she wanted me to give the sex talk. On the other hand, there are quite a few widows in this group…so maybe, they wanted a refresher course?  Maybe they didn’t remember my expertise?

Me:  So, Mrs. K., do you mean the SCARY TALK that I mentioned in passing about how healthcare costs and nursing home costs can truly make you destitute? Or……something else ( I wanted to make sure we were on the same page, my youthful good looks may have intrigued her to think something else.)

Mrs. K:  Absolutely. It’s time these women realized that there is terrifying information out there that they need to have. It’s time they got truly prepared.

 

What is going to happen to my money?!?

Me: I couldn’t agree more, but you need to let them know this is the SCARY TALK. No more “fun-and-games-Cathy.”  This will have to be the “I’m-not-even-kidding-Cathy.”

Mrs. K: Yes, you’ve warned me, I will warn them, and there is no time like the present.

So I went back and gave them the “SCARY TALK,” which, in my defense,  at my last talk while they were laughing and laughing at my granny panties (you have to come to a talk to see that one) I did suggest that they should have me back to give them the blood-curdling news.

They survived. It was a bit ugly.  But I actually got a thank you note for the shocking and intimidating information about the nursing home and healthcare crisis that may befall everyone in that room.

I’m on a mission now, not waiting until Halloween to give the SCARY TALK, it just may save people from horrendous consequences.

If you want the SCARY TALK…..let me know…..I’ve got it down pat.

“You Just Have to Laugh…..and get informed, and get prepared, and then you can Laugh Again!”  And then you’ll be like Peg!

Meet Beautiful Peg..She’s 106, nothing scares her!

©2018Cathy Sikorski

 

With Facebook Friends like this…Who Needs Enemies?

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Two years ago, my Mom called me, practically in tears.

“Roberta was so mean to me,” she said.

I’m thinking, “who the hell is Roberta?”.

“She’s from my medical insurance carrier. I called to ask her why a bill wasn’t paid and she said I should never have been given this insurance and I’m going to have to pay back every penny from the last 15 years.”

“And,” she went on with a worried tone, “you told me to NEVER pay a medical bill. So I don’t know what to do.”

“Calm down, Mom. We will get this worked out. It will be okay.”

My first reaction was this:

I did tell my Mom never to pay a medical bill because her insurance covers everything.

My mom has Tricare For Life Medical Insurance. This insurance is for Veterans and their families, spouses, widows, children. My Dad died in a helicopter crash as an Army pilot on October 10, 1961. My mother had five children all under the age of 10 and was pregnant with her sixth child. So I kind of think my Mom is entitled to this insurance.

The thing is, Mom never claimed this insurance until my step-father passed away in 1998. She didn’t even ask for it. She already had Medicare and AARP. But when she applied for her widow’s the Veteran’s Administration made her jump through all kinds of hoops with documentation and then GAVE her this insurance.

My mom is a Virgo.

Why does that matter? She has kept every single piece of paper that has ever come into her life. So she has every piece of documentation that transpired fifteen years ago with the Veteran’s Administration. The VA put her on the wrong insurance.

So two years ago, they began threatening an 87-year-old widow, who raised her family of six children without a father, a man never even made it to 30 years old, that she would be thousands of dollars in debt to them because of their mistake.

After talking to seven different people at seven different government administrative places which most people never even heard of, we refiled all the documentation from 15 years ago.

I wrote much of this post two years ago.  And much of the problem has been resolved after mountains of paperwork and dozens of phone calls…one that occurred while I was drinking in Times Square. Hey, if they call, you answer, because they may never call back.

I said this two years ago, probably after the drinking incident in Times Square:

 I know from the last 25 years of caregiving and jumping through administrative hoops that this story will not have an easy ending. There’s going to be reams of paperwork. There will likely be boatloads of nastiness. There may be a lawsuit. But in my best, Scarlett O’Hara voice: “As God is my witness….my mother will never pay one dime to fix this problem.”

There’s one small problem that persists. The government agencies just can’t agree and  are trying to collect $687 from my sweet ol’ mom that they think they are owed from overpayments. I still have people in all these agencies working on it and I have not yet caved to paying money to make it go away, but still…..I am amused by the latest missive from one of the insurers trying to collect funds:

Fun things to do while fighting with Insurance
Like us On Facebook……Indeed.

Hmmmm…..I’m struggling with that friend request.

©Cathy Sikorski 2018

 

Mistakes are Fun!

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Today you get to see one of my mistakes……..I made a video for the National Caregiving Conference, but as I’ve done since first grade in St. Aloysious Catholic School, I did not follow directions. So, I’m making another one………..but for a screw-up, it’s not bad. And the #NCC17 #NationalCaregivingConference said, “Hey, ……share it, anyway!” So, I am…because if there’s anything I do too much, it’s share!

P.S. I also think they said under their breath, “next time, read the directions.” But Sister Marie Genevieve said that a billion times and it never worked.

“You Just have to Laugh……”  ©2017 Cathy Sikorski

Laugh….and the world laughs with you……………

Caregivers, Humor, Medicare, , , , ,

Okay kids….it’s time to laugh, even just a little bit…

How do you know if you are a caregiver?

  1. If you are buying wipes and you don’t have a baby…..
  2. If you have dozens of medications in your house and none of them are yours…..
  3. If you wish some of them were yours…………..
  4. If, when someone says ‘whine’, you break out a long-stemmed glass……..
  5. If you get into your car and your car takes you to a nursing home but that’s not where you were going……….
  6. If you’re so tired that you used Preparation H to brush your teeth before bed….
  7. If you have dishes in the sink, laundry in the hamper, unpaid bills, and you drop everything to take your Mom to the doctor and the hairdresser and lunch and the bank and the pharmacy and the grocery store and the dry cleaners…….
  8. If you have on two different shoes…..
  9. If you just recently started using swear words that never came out of your mouth before….
  10. If you are so well-versed in medical-speak that they ask you to check on a patient in Room 612 ……..
  11. If when you say you’re going to the Vet, you don’t mean a place where animals get medical care….
  12. If you use so many acronyms like HIPPA, AARP, HMO, DME, SNF, OT, PT, ER, that you start spelling your kids’ names instead of saying them….
  13. If date night is now every Friday night in the Emergency Room….

Or this……

 

Check with your spouse, your significant other, your friends, your therapist….you just might be one of us!

“You Just have to Laugh…..”

©2017 Cathy Sikorski

Knock Knock…Who’s there? Good info…that’s who!

Caregivers, Humor, Medicare, , , ,

I attended an Elder Law Conference recently and as usual, my head is spinning. Lots to tell you, because not one of you is getting younger.

But the big takeaway was a talk by a dementia expert, Teepa Snow, on how we are truly failing those with this disease. It’s not them who’s the problem…it’s us.  We are so hellbent on proving we know what’s best for our loved ones, that we have done nothing to understand what it feels like to be them.

I was invited to do a Virtual Reality tour of what it’s like to have dementia. Unfortunately, I couldn’t go that day. But those who did said it was unbelievable. And enlightening. They quickly learned what it’s like to have someone in your face, someone yelling at you for no apparent reason, someone repeating to you when you believe you answered their question. I cannot stress enough how we need to take a good, hard look at what we, the caregivers, the health care workers, the families are doing. Ms. Snow told us there are 110 different kinds of dementia. 110. There can’t be a common answer to treatment for every single form. And locking every body up is not the answer. It is certainly not the quality of life answer for everyone.

I’m not naive. I realize that dementia has a big component of safety issues. Just spending 90 minutes with Ms. Snow, who has hours and hours of material, convinced me that as a public policy we need to re-think the concept of dementia care.

Her website is at teepsnow.com, and it’s called Positive Approach to Brain Change. If you have any family members at all who are suffering from any effects of dementia, please check out her website and her videos. They are remarkable and could be game-changing for your life right now.

And if any of you wonderful readers did not hear by now….I WON the contest to be the Keynote Speaker at the National Caregiver’s Conference. AND GUESS WHO THE SPEAKER IS RIGHT AFTER ME????  TEEPA SNOW! How great is that? I’m so excited to be meeting her once again after my Elder Law conference. Life is full of wonderful treats sometimes, isn’t it?

Since you read this far with no chuckles, I’m going to give you 3 Elder Law Knock Knock Jokes I found on the internet:

Knock Knock……….Who’s There?  Little Old Lady………Little Old Lady Who?

I didn’t know you could yodel!

Knock Knock…..Who’s there?   To………….To Who?

To WHOM!

Knock Knock….Who’s there?   Nana………….Nana Who?

Nanna You’re Business

I’m pretty sure you could use those jokes somewhere today!

“You Just have to Laugh……”

©Cathy Sikorski 2017

I know you love me….

Caregivers, Humor, , , , , ,

So many of you have already voted for me to be the guest Keynote Speaker at the National Caregivers’ Conference in Chicago in November. But in case you are not a Facebook Friend or I don’t have your email. I’m posting the link here in hopes that you will mosey over to this website, scroll to the bottom on the left where the names of all the finalists are and click on my name and then click the vote button! You can certainly look at my video, but it’s not necessary. Just need your vote. Thanks for your support, I will do my best to make you proud of me, my blessed readers! Tomorrow, I promise you another hilarious story!

https://www.caregiving.com/ncc17/keynote/vote/