The beauty of sharing a sense of humor with the one you are caregiving for is beyond measure.
My brother-in-law has been in and out of rehab and the hospital for 8 months now. It has been a rocky road……and not sweet, like the ice cream. But he has turned a miraculous corner and although, still in rehab for a few more weeks, I have confidence that he will finally be returning home and will be relatively healthy for a good long time.
Since he has come so far, he is finally taking an interest in his daily life and activities that eluded him while desperately trying to get healthy. And he’s funny again. He is entertaining his healthcare workers, and any one else who walks in the door, which, of course, I love.
On my trek to see him yesterday, I took my Mom and husband as we were then going to have dinner with a friend who lives close by the rehab center. It takes us an hour to get there, so we decided to take advantage of being in our friend’s neck of the woods.
A half hour before we left, there appeared some calls and one message on my cell phone from the rehab center. The nurse stated that my BIL had a few lab work issues, but if I didn’t get back to her today, we could discuss it tomorrow. As I was on my way down there to see him, I thought: Okay, no big deal. I did return her call, but she was gone for the day.
When we arrived at his room, his bed was stripped and his wheelchair was empty. That is always a panic button for any caregiver. Where the hell is my brother-in-law????? At the nurses’ station, the nurse tells me that they sent him to the ER because his hemaglobin was so low, he might need a transfusion.
“You couldn’t leave a message that he’s at the hospital, that I just passed on the way here, so I could stop there first?”
No answer.
Off we go to the ER and they usher us into his room. There he is joking with the nurses, and, feeling relieved that he seems okay, I say, “well, yet another hospital we get to check out. Whoopee!”
This is how I know he’s ever so much better overall: “Well at least, it’s not a Friday night!” he says.
Classically, for the last 8 months, we have gone to the hospital without fail on a Friday night. I told him my husband was getting jealous of our date nights.
Then he turns to the nurse and asks, “can I have a Jack Daniels with that Percoset?”
Then he goes into a litany:
“So now I’m going to miss my dinner. I told them at rehab, “hey, what about dinner?”. Then I come here and I’m asking them, “where’s my dinner?” But no, no dinner. And you know they’re going to screw around, and no food or drink until they decide what to do with me. And then they are going to tell me I’m fine, because I feel fine, but then what about my dinner?”
See, all of this is a sure sign that all is well in brother-in-law land. If his focus is dinner, dinner, dinner…………….he’s in great shape. You caregivers know what i mean.
In the spirit of kind caregiving and true sympathy to his plight, I say:
“Well, okay, now that we see you’re okay, we’re going to take our friend out to dinner! See you later!”
He bursts out laughing. Yay…………
“You Just have to Laugh………..”
© Cathy Sikorski
GTLI- this is fantastic news Czthy and a great story. Go BIL and you all – go to dinner! Hope it was delish!
Yep…good dinner, but Larry missed his, so you brought him a cheesesteak the next day!
sounds like your Brother in law is getting better. plus he has great taste in whiskey (as well as a great caregiver), Jack Daniels. I take minds with a little sprite. smiles!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I’ll note that Jerome!
As we say in France & Switzerland “bon courage” to you and your brother in law in his challenging journey. He is very lucky to have your support and sense of humor.
Yes, Pat we are surely on a journey and laughter keeps us a bit more sane every day. Thanks for reading and commenting!
Oh my gosh the empty bed would have flipped me out! And yes, I agree, what great supports you are!
Glad you could laugh after enduring the fright of seeing an empty bed and getting the cold shoulder from the nurse!
Yea…that empty bed thing always sends a chill down the spine…..but all’s well that end’s well. Thanks for reading!
Another example of how laughter cures all ills. I love this story. It speaks volumes about YOU, dear Cathy, and what an exceptional person you are.
Thanks Helene, my brother-in-law and I have entered a journey we never expected. However, I will say that both of us laugh a whole lot, which makes it a bit easier every day!
So glad your BIL is on the mend! He is so fortunate to have you in his life.
We have a good time sometimes, believe it or not! And yes, I am so very grateful he is on the mend. Thanks for reading!
Cheers to your brother feeling better! Fabulous news and such a relief for you, I’m sure.
Everything’s better with a sense of humor. And a shot of JD, too. Again, cheers!
Yea, I’m actually going to the JD factory……..I feel I deserve it, and I can get samples for my BIL.
At least he didn’t send you out for a cheese steak.
Okay, you caught me………….he actually tried, but I had to refuse.
I just spent hoursssssssssssss in the ER with a client after she fell. She was completely stressed over her dinner too.
Back at the nursing facilty from hell they made her a sandwich.
Ihope your BIL continues to improve.
Oh Doreen, we are so connected, aren’t we? I know. We should probably make a secret documentary about this crap. What do you think?
Blessings to him on his journey. What great supports you are!
Thanks Carol. and there are blessings in caregiving. For me, laughter helps a whole bunch. Thanks for reading!